The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Write at least 150 words.
The diagram illustrates the
process
of how
sugar
canes
Correct your spelling
can
show examples
be converted into
sugar
.
Overall
,
this
process
took people seven steps to complete and requires various kinds of machines, tools, and skills.
To begin
with, after 12-18 months of growing,
sugar
canes
Fix the agreement mistake
cane
show examples
become
Correct subject-verb agreement
becomes
show examples
mature enough and can
therefore
be harvested, the harvesting step can be done by either machines or farmers.
Next,
sugar
canes
Fix the agreement mistake
cane
show examples
will be sent into a crushing machine and turned into juice. After becoming a form of liquid, the juice will experience a few distinct
process
steps.
Firstly
, it'll be purified in a limestone filter to make sure that several undesired components are removed.
Secondly
, an evaporator can heat the juice and let it become the syrup.
Finally
,
sugar
crystals in the syrup will be separated in a centrifuge. Once these
sugar
crystals are fully drying and cooling, the whole
process
is finished successfully and we get the
sugar
that people normally see in the markets.
Submitted by arthur752102 on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words process, sugar with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacturing process
  • sugar cane
  • harvesting
  • transporting
  • factory
  • crushing
  • extracting
  • juice
  • filtering
  • impurities
  • heating
  • evaporating
  • syrup
  • boiling
  • crystallizing
  • sugar
  • separating
  • drying
  • packaging
  • distribution
  • stage
  • process
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