Nowadays the differences between countries are becoming less evident because people follow the same media. Do the advantage of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

With the current globalization
trend
, boundaries between countries are becoming more blurred as
people
around the world consume the same
media
. Despite some possible drawbacks of
this
development, I still think the benefits outweigh the downsides. There are various reasons why
this
trend
is advantageous to the whole society.
Firstly
, by following
news
globally, we can learn about social issues happening in other countries and apply the solutions to our own.
For
example
, many Vietnamese, especially teenagers and young adults, were interested in the recent US presidential election. Many
people
have reported that they have become more engaged in political issues in general.
As a result
,
this
year’s election in
Vietnam
saw a peak in engagement among young adults, with many discussions in online forums.
Secondly
, more
people
are watching the same
media
, like YouTube, which can be an opportunity for us to promote our own culture.
For
example
, more international food bloggers and reviewers are going to
Vietnam
because they saw videos and TV series broadcasted about Vietnamese food on these global
media
outlets.
As a result
, the number of tourists to
Vietnam
has significantly increased.
However
, I must admit that there are some disadvantages to
this
trend
.
Firstly
, limiting one’s
media
consumption to outlets that feature
news
from around the world can mean being ignorant about local
news
.
For
example
, a small piece of local information, like a recent robbery, can get lost amongst various
news
coming from around the world.
As a result
, many can become insensitive to changes in the local community.
Secondly
, one might lose one’s cultural identity if following global
media
outlets carelessly. With the rising
trend
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
the Korean entertainment industry, many
people
in
Vietnam
are adapting to the Korean lifestyle,
for
example
.
This
overall
is still a harmless
trend
, but in extreme cases, it has led to young adults degrading their own cultural identities and chasing after foreign cultures. In conclusion, I understand that there are some disadvantages to
this
globalization
trend
in
media
consumption.
However
, I think that the advantages brought by
this
development far outweigh the disadvantages.

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task response
Expand on your main points with more detailed examples and delve deeper into how these examples support your argument to enhance clarity and comprehensiveness.
coherence cohesion
Consider varying your sentence structures more to improve the readability and flow of your essay. This will also help in making your arguments more compelling.
coherence cohesion
While you have done a good job introducing and concluding your essay, ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next by using more cohesive devices and transition words.
task response
You provided a balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages, which shows a good understanding of the essay task.
positive example
The use of relevant examples from Vietnam regarding the U.S. presidential election and the influence of global media on local tourism strengthens your arguments.
positive structure
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and articulate your stance effectively, contributing to a strong logical structure.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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